Thursday, February 23, 2023

List of Publications

This is a list of messages in the blog.  Clicking on a title goes to a description with a link to the article or you can do a browser search within this list.  Feel free to use any of this material in any way that supports His cause!  We’ve put books about marriage on our Amazon author page:

https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

Microsoft Word files for many messages are in a public folder:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing 
It also has audio files of some messages.  Students can listen to the talks while reading them to learn English.  November 9, 2024

Table of Contents

Women Should Know What My Wife Told Me Before We Were Married. 1

Why Johnny Lingo Paid Eight Cows for his Wife. 1

Two Pages of Bible Verses about Marriage. 2

Adam’s failure. 2

Don’t Be Discouraged! 2

Casual sex damages your brain. 2

Making your spouse feel safe in being married to you is the foundation of a lasting marriage. 3

Having Answers for an Interested Man. 3

Marriage runs on how a man treats his wife.  That’s driven by how he and she set her value. 3

How can parents teach premarital purity?. 3

Having an Answer for an Interested Man. 3

Marriage is based on a mixture of logic and emotion, it runs on facts and feelings. 4

Marry in haste, repent at leisure. 4

What Women Need from their Husbands. 4

Asking God’s Help in Marriage. 5

Two Pages of Bible Verses about Marriage –it really is that simple. 5

Comparing Salvation with Marriage. 5

Conditions for Revival 5

One-Minute Marriage – Explaining God’s Simple Plan of Marriage in 60 Seconds. 6

What Drives Men To Marry. 6

The Bible Explains Marriage in One Verse. 6

10-Word Marriage Theology. 6

How Ruth Found Rest in the Home of her Husband. 7

Handling Conflict in Marriage. 7

Why God Made Men and Women Think So Differently. 7

Why Marriages Fail 8

The Vital Role of Sex in Marriage. 8

God Demonstrates His Unconditional Love for Us and His Holiness in a way Everyone Sees. 8

How a Man Protects His Wife. 9

What Should Older Women Teach Younger Women About Men?. 10

Older Women must show that Scripture explains what drives men to marry: 10

The Lesson of Leah – Having a Man’s Baby Won’t Make Him Marry You. 10

The Sacrifice of Salvation and the Sacrifice of Marriage. 11

A Man’s Unbelief That Harms Marriage. 12

Women’s Sin that can Destroy a Nation. 12

Loving Others as God Loves Us. 12

American Dating Culture Destroys God’s Simple Plan of Marriage. 13

Forgiveness is Not Optional for Christians. 13

The Theological Foundations of Marriage. 14

Salvation and Marriage use the Same Plan. 14

God's Simple Plan of Marriage. 14

The Holiness of Marriage. 14

Marriage Should Bless Both Parties. 14

What About Divorce?. 15

When A Young Man pursues your daughter, what will you tell him you expect from her husband?. 15

Discussion Points for Couples. 15

Husbands Leading Wives in Exploring God's Plan for Marriage. 16

Men Push Hard for Sex When Women Don’t Say “No!”. 16

What Do Women Desire?. 16

Toy or Treasure. 17

The Perils of Premature Perception and Proclamation of Pairing. 17

What Evolution and History Teach About Marriage. 17

Parents and Churches Must Uphold Marriage. 18

Is What I want to do the Will of God. 18

The Many Ways Jesus Turned the World Upside-Down. 18

Jesus Gently Encouraged the Apostle Peter’s Spiritual Growth. 18

My Favorite Easter message - the Gospel of Jesus Death, Resurrection, Grace, Forgiveness, and Salvation in 2 Words – “and Peter”. 19

What Drove Jesus’ 11 Nobodies to Turn the World Upside-down?. 19

How did this happen?. 19

How to be God’s Friend. 20

Relating to God by Loving God. 20

Comparative Religion - Comparing Christianity with Other Religions. 21

Boaz Did Not Redeem Ruth. 21

God Tells You How to Prosper. 21

Adam Refused to Ask for God’s Forgiveness and Brought Sin on Us All 21

God’s Pattern for Human History. 22

What the Bible Teaches About Leadership. 22

How Many Commands did Jesus give us?. 22

God Wrote the Bible to be Read from Many Points of View.. 23

It was the church, not society, which redefined marriage away. 23

It was the church, not society, that led in the destruction of the American justice system.. 23

Using the Bible when Making Decisions. 24

False Gods Worshipped Today. 24

God’s Concern for the Fatherless. 25

God’s Simple Plan for Reconciliation. 25

Having Answers About our Hope in God and in Marriage. 25

Illogical Blends Found in Scripture. 25

Calvinism.. 26

Teaching Aids. 27

Easy Believism.. 27

All Things are Possible. 27

Winning the Lost 27

Teaching the Bible Through 150 Questions. 28

Don’t Step in the Holes. 28

Old Testament Survey – What God Gave “For Our Learning” *. 29

Wedding Wisdom.. 30

What God Said About Marriage. 31

Why we use the King James Bible (KJB) 31

Oldest Manuscript 32

Lessons of History. 32

Imperfect Jesus. 33

Preservation. 33

Version Confusion. 33

Outline for a Marriage Seminar. 34

Seminar Opening Message - Married Couples Should Only Praise Each Other. 35

Marriage Seminar for a Pastor’s Conference. 35

Drawing Closer To Each Other by Drawing Closer to God. 37

Causes of Marriage Problems. 37

Transcendental Questions:  Why are we here?  How did the universe and life come to be?. 37

The Conflict Between Logic and Traditional Culture. 38

Fatal Flaws in Fundamentalism.. 38

Making a Career in Computer Science. 38

Is The Bible True?. 39

Preferences. 40

END.. 41

 

Women Should Know What My Wife Told Me Before We Were Married

Men know that an unhappy woman can be very painful, so they try not to let themselves get emotionally involved.  Men are happy to play with a woman, but are reluctant to admit their feelings for her (John 21:15-17).  They try to avoid emotional involvement:

Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.  Proverbs 4:23

Women generally ask for very little and that’s what they get.  If a woman lets herself become emotionally involved with a man before he’s committed himself to her by marrying her, she’s in for a world of hurt.  Few women have the words to explain their needs to men.  I was blessed that the Holy Spirit led my wife to tell me her needs and describe her plans to be a treasured wife.

Other men have said they'd marry a woman who said what she said and meant it.  If a woman says what my wife said a man may feel more confident of making her happy, be more willing to become emotionally involved with her, and see that making her happy will make him very happy indeed.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#approaches

Courtship is when she finds out if he trusts her enough to open his heart to her and tell her his dreams, desires, goals, wants, and frustrations and he finds out whether she respects him in spite of his mistakes.  Pr. 31:1 shows that Mrs. Lemuel taught her son how to care for his future wife.  Working mothers don’t have enough time or emotional energy to do that, so a young lady needs the words to explain her needs.

What she said made me feel safe in opening my heart to her (Pr. 31:11) which made me belong to her.  It’s as scary for a man to open his heart to a woman as for a woman to open herself to a man; what she said made me feel safe with her.  We later learned that it is extremely difficult for a woman to belong to a man who won’t open his heart to her.

There is no joy for a man this side of heaven that compares with having a woman like belonging to him, but he has to convince her that he’s glad to belong to her and glad to care for her for that to work.

If a man starts pursuing a woman, she could suggest that he read what my wife told me and also the story of Johnny Lingo.

Why Johnny Lingo Paid Eight Cows for his Wife

This story teaches men what women need.  In many ways, a wife is what her husband makes her.  Her husband sets her view of her value by the way he treats her and the way he talks about her.  The better he treats her, the better wife she becomes.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2013/10/why-johnny-lingo-paid-eight-cows-for.html

She can make him no happier than he makes her (Ecc. 9:9).  Proclaiming her great value publicly makes her happy, and that makes him happy.

If a man is pursuing a woman, she might want him to read this story and also discuss what my wife told me before we were married:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#ToldMeBefore

Few women can explain their needs to men, and no man will figure it out.  I was blessed that God knew He couldn't give her to me without telling me a few things first, so the Holy Spirit led her to require that I treat her as a treasure before she'd date me.

I saw that if she was telling the truth, I’d be foolish not to marry her.  When I found she meant what she said, I married her as rapidly as we could get a dress in those pre-Internet days. Other men have told me they'd immediately marry a woman who said what she said and meant it.

Two Pages of Bible Verses about Marriage

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#handout

Adam’s failure

God put Adam in the Garden of Eden to “dress it and keep it (Gen. 2:15).”  He failed to protect the garden from the serpent, and his choosing to disobey God by eating the forbidden fruit caused the fall of all of mankind.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#AdamFail

Adam’s sin not only cost him his soft and easy job “dressing the garden (Gen. 2:15),” it also made life a lot harder for his wife Eve and for all women who came after her.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#inTheGarden

Don’t Be Discouraged!

The articles in this blog discuss God’s gift of marriage as described in Holy Scripture.  People who weren’t raised in good homes or in places where God’s ideas were taught may find themselves discouraged - they feel they can’t ever get close to God’s ideals, so why try?

We all fail from time to time.  Even people who’ve been following Christ for years can find courage in seeing how Jesus never gave up on the Apostle Peter and gave Peter the strength to serve Him in spite of Peter’s many failings as described here:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#wentAfter

Casual sex damages your brain

Neurological research has found that sex strongly affects your brain by binding you to your sexual partner.  This can also happen through flirting or hugging.  The research explains many of God’s commands about sexual behavior.

Having sex with lots of people binds you to each one.  This can make it impossible to build a stable relationship with anyone.  This article quotes from Hooked: The Brain Science on How Casual Sex Affects Human Development on Amazon at https://a.co/d/23NZaPL to explain the research and tie it to Scripture.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#hooked

Making your spouse feel safe in being married to you is the foundation of a lasting marriage.

It’s a LOT of work but the rewards of having your spouse LIKE being married to you make it all worthwhile.  Here’s how to do it:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#feelSafe

Having Answers for an Interested Man

In the old days, older women taught younger women about men.  Now, they ALSO have to teach what a woman IS - our society has forgotten.

Pr. 31:1 shows that King Lemuel’s mother taught him how to nourish and cherish his future wife.  Working mothers don’t have enough time or emotional energy to do that.

Older women must also teach what to say when a man approaches her so she can explain her needs.  A man can then decide whether he can make her happy if a woman explains clearly.  If she does it kindly, he’ll see that making her happy will make him VERY happy.  He’ll want to marry her if that’s the only way she will let him have her.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#approaches

This explains that what women ask for drives civilization.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#havingAnswers

This part discusses what neurological research tells us about why David was driven to murder Uriah the Hittite:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/neuroscience-research-proves-that.html#Bathsheba

This is a stand-alone paper

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/neuroscience-research-proves-that.html

Marriage runs on how a man treats his wife.  That’s driven by how he and she set her value

A woman sets her value by how she behaves.  The price of a virtuous woman is far beyond rubies.  Her price should be his life for her life.  If her price is a few dinners or movies, she isn’t worth much.  If she and he set her value high, it will be easier for her to belong to him.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#meekAndQuiet

How can parents teach premarital purity?

Many parents who’re trying to teach their children about the dangers of premarital sex don’t know what to say.  This can be particularly difficult if the parents did things that turned out to hurt them.  They don’t want their children to suffer the same way they did, but they may be embarrassed to explain what went wrong.  This is a thought on how to explain:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#confessing

Having an Answer for an Interested Man

Pr. 31:1 shows that King Lemuel’s mother taught him how to nourish and cherish his future wife.  Working mothers don’t have enough time or emotional energy to do that so few Christian men know how to bless a wife.  Therefore, it’s a good idea for a woman to have answers when a man shows interest – she must be firm but kind in explaining where she can’t compromise.  A man can decide whether he can make her happy or not if a woman explains her needs clearly and calmly.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#havingAnswers

Marriage is based on a mixture of logic and emotion, it runs on facts and feelings.

This post shows how facts and feelings interacted in our time of courtship and after we married.  It started with emotion – I was attracted to her and she liked being wanted – but we didn’t let our feelings get strongly involved until we were satisfied that our being together would make logical sense.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#headKnowledge

Marry in haste, repent at leisure

A woman needs to KNOW how a man feels about women in general and about her in particular in his heart.  The most basic test is to ask who misquoted God:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#whoMisquoted

There are ways for a woman to explore a man’s heart to find out how he’ll relate to her if they marry.  She should ask God first, of course,

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#askGod  

but she should also ask him:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#askHim

What Women Need from their Husbands

God expects a man to love his wife as Christ loves His church:

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.  Ephesians 5:25-28

Jesus presents us to Himself a “glorious church” in verse 27.  Every man wants to present to himself a “glorious wife,” and there’s a simple way to have one – convince her he’s convinced that she is a glorious wife.  This article explains how a man should do that.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#whatWomenNeed

God ordained both salvation and marriage.  If you try to go to Heaven your own way, you go to Hell when you die.  If you try to do marriage your own way, you can make life Hell on earth, but if you do it God’s way, you can give each other a taste of the joys of Heaven, right here on earth.

You may be surprised how simple marriage is.  Salvation is two words, sexuality is 3 words, getting married is 3 words, staying married is 2 words, etc.  Check out Sound Bite Marriage:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/sound-bite-marriage.html

This is a short explanation of the need for a husband to help his wife become “a glorious wife, without spot or wrinkle” as Jesus helps the Church become “a glorious church, without spot or wrinkle.”

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/sound-bite-marriage.html#gloriousWife

Jesus expects husband and wife to forget their former independent selves and dedicate their lives to serving each other:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/sound-bite-marriage.html#serveEachOther

Asking God’s Help in Marriage

When God rejected her college boyfriend, my wife asked God to choose her husband. God couldn’t give her to me without counseling me first. The Holy Spirit told her what to say to build our marriage.

Few women can explain themselves to men, and no man can figure it out. What God led my wife to tell me will give a woman words to make a man confident he can make her happy. This will make him feel safe opening his heart to her and convince him that making her happy will make him very happy indeed.  See:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/sound-bite-marriage.html#bulletPoints

This is also short - Marriage in 3 paragraphs:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#seePerfect

Two Pages of Bible Verses about Marriage –it really is that simple

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#handout

God knew that we would have a hard time with His plan of salvation. We couldn’t possibly handle two plans, so He made one plan work for both.  This article has a number of one-paragraph ways to show how salvation and marriage are built on the same ideas:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#marriageAndSalvation

God knew we would have trouble believing that He could ever love us so He gave us an example of unconditional love that everyone sees:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#showsHoliness

Comparing Salvation with Marriage

Marriage is as simple as salvation.  This post has many short paragraphs showing how salvation and marriage are alike.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#marriageAndSalvation

Conditions for Revival

God gave us a simple way to make peace whenever someone becomes offended.  When people in a family, church, or business office don’t do what God commands to heal offenses, resentment builds up.  People forget why they’re upset; they just remember that they’re angry without knowing why.  This extends God’s plan of reconciliation between two people to help heal hurts in groups.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#angryGroup

Marriage and salvation are so similar and so simple that you can explain both in 60 seconds:

One-Minute Marriage – Explaining God’s Simple Plan of Marriage in 60 Seconds

Marriage is simpler than we think.  This paper explains both salvation and marriage in 60 seconds.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#oneMinuteMarriage

Please comment at the bottom of the web page.

What Drives Men To Marry

It would save a lot of grief if older women explained men.  Young women need to know that most men are far more physically driven than most women.  They also need to know what drives men to marry:

http://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2013/10/what-drives-men-to-marry.html

Women used to say, "Not unless we're married, and I won't marry you unless you grow up and get a job."  If a woman lets a man have her without marrying, what would marriage give him that he doesn’t have?

Marriage means nothing or she’d insist on it instead of just giving herself.  If she gives herself to him without marriage, how can he trust her not to give herself to someone else?

Men know little about women; how does a man know whom he should marry?  If he can have her without marriage, she isn't worth marrying.  If he can't, he’ll marry her if he wants her badly enough.

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

The Bible Explains Marriage in One Verse

God ordained both salvation and marriage.  If we try to do salvation our own way, we go to Hell when we die.  If we try to do marriage our own way, we can make life Hell on earth, but if we do it God’s way, we can give each other a taste of Heaven, right here on earth.

There is no joy for a man this side of heaven that compares with having a woman like belonging to him, but he has to convince her that he’s glad to belong to her and glad to care for her for that to work.

Marriage is simpler than we think.  This post analyzes the ONE BIBLE VERSE which tells us a simple way to build a marriage that gives both parties a taste of the joys of heaven, right here on earth.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#oneVerse

As with salvation, few there be that find it (Mt. 7:14).

Please comment at the bottom of the web page.

10-Word Marriage Theology

We do what we do because of what we believe about God.  Atheists try to convince themselves that God doesn’t exist so they don’t have to worry about what God thinks of what they do (Ps. 14:1, 53:1).  Christians who believe God is good read the Bible looking for keys to happiness; Christians who think God wrote rules to keep them from having fun read the Bible looking for ways to get around His rules.

Husband and wife can’t understand each other well enough to relate properly to each other unless they understand God well enough to relate properly to Him (Jn. 4:23-24).  This 10-word theology for marriage and practical living shows how knowing God improves marriages:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#tenWordTheology

Please improve the article by commenting at the end of the web page.

God has arranged that scientific discoveries would confirm the Bible to make it easier for His people to believe His Word in our time of unbelief.  This shows how discoveries in astronomy and in medicine going back before the time of Sir Isaac Newton confirm the Bible.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#firstThreeWords

Please improve the article by commenting at the end of the web page.

How Ruth Found Rest in the Home of her Husband

God gave us the Book of Ruth as a romance novel - poverty stricken widow goes to a strange land to find God, works hard, marries a rich guy, and becomes the great-grandmother of a king.  Men who might want to marry a good woman should understand how Boaz honored Ruth so that she wanted to marry him.

It didn't occur to Boaz to marry Ruth, but when she gave him the idea, he thought it was such a good idea that he rushed out the next morning and married her for the same reason Jacob wanted to marry (Ge. 29:31).  This paper lists Ruth's Rules for behavior which made Boaz want to marry her.  They still work.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#ruthsRules

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Handling Conflict in Marriage

Revival happens when a church gets its act together.  In order for a church to be of “one mind” as God commands (Ro. 15:6, 2 Co. 13:11, Phi. 1:27, 1 Pe. 3:8), husbands and wives must first be of one mind.

There will be disagreements no matter how well you follow the marriage principles in the Bible, but disagreement should not lead to conflict or heated words.  Conflict has been studied a lot because office conflict costs businesses so much.  Here’s a simple research-based way to avoid conflict in marriage and at work.  It is based on Biblical principles:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#ConflictInMarriage

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Why God Made Men and Women Think So Differently

God made males and females think differently to help us be fruitful and multiply.  Instead of trusting that a loving God He created us to bless each other, many complain that God made their spouses wrong.  Women complain that men are too possessive, too controlling, and can’t find anything in a refrigerator.  Men complain that women are too emotional and talk too much.

Very few people can explain their thought processes.  This short paper discusses the different ways male and female brains work to help couples talk about how they think.  Understanding draws them closer.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#thinkDifferent

Psalm 68:6 explains that God loved us enough to put solitary people in families.  If you don’t see how something about your spouse’s basic nature blesses you and your family, that’s your problem, not God’s.  It took many years for us to figure out how some of my wife’s characteristics blessed our family, but things got smoother once we saw that God had given us different brains to bless each other out of love for us.

This note explains another way in which men and women think differently:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#notALight  

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Why Marriages Fail

We’ve known many couples whose marriages failed.  Most failures were rooted in neither party having been taught what the other person expected.  This paper discusses major areas of ignorance that make marriages fail and suggests ways to help people build solid families and solid churches.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/why-marriages-fail.html

People don’t know how to drive cars or balance checkbooks without being taught; why expect anyone to know how to be married without being taught?

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

The Vital Role of Sex in Marriage

Sex is very important to marriage.  By sex, I mean the physical joining of one man and one woman into one flesh.  There are three aspects of sex that concern you: the mechanical or medical aspects; the moral aspects; and the mental, or emotional, aspects of sex.  “How to” is too simple for a talk.

Sexual morality, that is, “when to,” is only 50% more complicated than salvation.  Salvation is two words, “only believe,” that’s all.  God says that sexual morality is three words, “only within marriage.”  The “when to” of becoming one flesh is only after you’re married, period, no discussion, end of story.  There’s a very good reason to obey this command which we’ll explore.

That leaves the emotional aspects of sex.  God designed us so that sex has a profound impact on our lives.  God made sex drives powerful to help couples stay married.  God designed sex to bless us but young people aren’t being taught how to handle sex.  Messing it up brings great grief to many couples.

The fault in handling sex lies mostly with men.  Women aren’t being taught about men by older women.  This leaves them vulnerable to being damaged by men who go against the Word of God by having sex outside marriage.  God tells us what happens when we go against His will:

And he gave them their request; but sent leanness into their soul.  Psalm 106:15

This is another way of saying that we reap what we sow (Gal 6:7).  Men have sown disobedience to God in taking women without marrying; that makes both parties miss the joy God intended for marriage.  This sin brings leanness into a man’s soul.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/the-vital-role-of-sex-in-marriage.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

God Demonstrates His Unconditional Love for Us and His Holiness in a way Everyone Sees

God Demonstrates His Love in a way Everyone Sees!

It’s hard to understand how a Holy, perfect God can love wretched sinners like you and me (Ps. 8:4, Heb. 2:6).  God knew it would be hard for us to believe that He loved us enough to die to save us so that we could be cleansed of our sins.  This article explains how He arranged motherhood so that everyone could see an unmistakable example of His unconditional love.  This helps us understand His love for us.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#demonstratesLove

God Demonstrates His Holiness in a way Everyone Sees!

Some churches preach only the love of God without teaching repentance and turning from sin.  A love-only message is meaningless because it doesn’t define sin or tell people that God hates sin (Ps. 7:11b).  How can people repent and seek forgiveness without being made aware of their sins (Ro. 3:10)?

Others preach only God’s holiness and leave out His love.  Leaving out God’s love makes His holiness repugnant because holiness alone is too harsh.  Without knowing God’s love, people cannot feel confident of His care for us (1 Pe. 5:7) or of His promise never to leave us (He. 13:5).  This shows how He shows us His holiness and how it works together which His unconditional love.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/04/god-demonstrates-his-holiness-in-way.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

How a Man Protects His Wife

Young men who read this were astounded at how differently women feel about how God designed this man-woman thing.  One said, “Please tell them!”  Older women should do that (Titus 2:4-5), but they aren’t.  This message is intended for men but will also help older women know what to teach.

You must earn your wife’s trust from the moment you meet her until death.  How can she respect, follow, open herself, obey you, honor you, and submit herself to you if she can’t trust you?  She’ll want to know whether you will lead her, and if so, will you lead her gently?  Where will you take her?

Do you blame everything that goes wrong on her as Adam did (Gen. 3:12) or do you take responsibility?  God appointed you to lead; you must be worthy of her following you.  Failure belongs to you, so you must work with her and use her gifts with yours to figure out how to prevent future failures.

I tell young men, “You must protect your wife from you.  God made men bigger and stronger than women, so you are the person most likely to hurt your wife by bumping into her or tripping over her.  God gave women more sensitive emotions than He gave men, so you are most likely to hurt her feelings by careless talk.”

Shortly before our wedding, my future wife asked that I never fuss at her.  “I want to love you very much,” she said.  “The more I love you, the more disapproval will hurt me.  I won’t be able to love you as much as I want to love you if you hurt me.”  You can’t un-say something hurtful no matter how you try:

“The moving finger writes; and, having writ, moves on: nor all thy piety nor wit shall lure it back to cancel half a line, nor all thy tears wash out a word of it. -- Omar Khayyam.

Many other areas where wives need protection are described in

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#ManProtectsWife

No matter how well you follow the marriage principles in the Bible, there will be disagreement from time to time.  Conflict between workers costs businesses so much that it's been studied a lot.  This article tells how to avoid conflict, that is, avoid fighting over disagreements:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#ConflictInMarriage   has a simple research-based way to avoid conflict both in relationships and at work.  The research expands on Biblical principles.

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

What Should Older Women Teach Younger Women About Men?

The Bible commands older women to teach younger women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be chaste, keepers at home, good, and obedient to their own husbands (Titus 2:3-4) because they don’t know how.  Mothers teach daughters how to cook, clean, and care for houses; they also have to teach how to love husbands and children.

My wife tells a young lady that her husband dreams of having sex 5 times before breakfast, lunch, dinner, and bed (Gen. 29:21).  God seldom gives him that much strength, but that’s his plan.

Even a girl who hasn’t dated knows that she’ll lose her independence and belong to a man if she lets him do that.  That sounds scary, but when she realizes that she’ll want him to open his heart to her whenever she wants to talk, which is at least that often, she’ll decide it will be OK to belong to him if he belongs to her and appreciates her.  If he’s hers, seeing his joy in having her makes her happy.  If he's not hers, opening herself to him is oppressive and she won't want to do it (Deu. 21:14, 22:29, Eze. 22:10-11).  The wife in the Song of Solomon agrees that it’s important that her husband belong to her (Song 1:2, 2:16, 6:3).

If she looks up at him at the right time and says, “I like being yours.  We could do that more often if you were in better shape,” she can encourage him to exercise which will help him live longer.  God said it is not good for a man to be alone; God generally arranges for men to die before their wives.  Keeping her husband alive longer shortens her widowhood but takes a lot of emotional energy.  Her husband must appreciate her greatly in order for her to be able to do this.

Older Women must show that Scripture explains what drives men to marry:

And Jacob said unto Laban, Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in unto herGenesis 29:21

Men are motivated mainly by sex.  This makes the sexual behavior of women the main force in keeping society going.  Women used to say, "Not unless we're married, and I won't marry you unless you grow up and get a job."  If a man can have sex without working to support his wife, why work at all?

If a woman says she wants to marry but lets a man have her without marrying her, he feels that she's a liar.  Marriage clearly means nothing to her or she’d insist on it instead of just giving herself.  If she gives herself to him without marriage, how can he trust her not to give herself to someone else?

If he already has her, what would marrying her give him that he doesn't already have?  Men know very little about women; how does a man know whom he should marry?  If he can have her without marriage, she isn't worth marrying.  If he can't, he will marry her if he wants her badly enough.

My wife tells a young lady that her husband dreams of having sex 5 times before breakfast, lunch, dinner, and bed (Gen. 29:21).  God seldom gives him that much strength, but that’s his plan.

This explains what else older women should teach younger women before they get serious about a man.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#OlderWomenTeach

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The Lesson of Leah – Having a Man’s Baby Won’t Make Him Marry You

The Bible makes it extremely clear what drives men to marry.  Jacob loved Rachel the moment he saw her (Ge. 29:19) and worked for Laban for 7 years to earn the right to take her to wife:

And Jacob said unto Laban, Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in unto herGenesis 29:21

Jacob wanted Rachel badly enough to work hard to earn the right to marry her.  Why was he willing to do that?  He wanted her that badly.  A woman can never understand a man’s physical drive any more than a man can understand how a mother feels about her newborn, but she needs to know this about men.

Caring for a woman gives meaning to a man’s life; living with her and having her pay “her share” of the rent does not.  Surveys of couples who’re living together show that the women believe they’ll be married “in a year or two,” but that the men don’t think they’ll ever marry.  A woman may get tired of waiting for “next year” that never comes and decide to have his baby to get him to marry her.

Having a man’s baby doesn’t make a man love a woman.  When Laban tricked Jacob into marrying Leah instead of Rachel, the Bible tells us that Leah was hated and Rachel was loved.  Leah thought that giving Jacob a son would make him love her.  Genesis 29:30-35 shows that by the time her 4th was born, Leah realized that having Jacob’s sons wouldn’t make him love her.  Abraham, father of Jews and Arabs and honored by both, didn’t marry all the women who had his babies:

But unto the sons of the concubines, which Abraham had, Abraham gave gifts, and sent them away from Isaac his son, while he yet lived, eastward, unto the east country.  Genesis 25:6

Abraham, the Friend of God (2 Chron. 20:7, Isa. 41:8), got at least two women pregnant besides his three wives.  Did he marry them?  No, he sent them away (Ge. 24:73).  Having a baby is not the way to get a man to marry you.  This article explains what a woman should do to get a man to marry and explains what to do to get herself back to being a treasure if he walks out when she insists:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/the-lesson-of-leah-having-mans-baby.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

The Sacrifice of Salvation and the Sacrifice of Marriage

God ordained both salvation and marriage.  IF we try to do salvation our own way, we go to Hell when we die.  If we try to do marriage our own way, we can make life Hell on earth, but if we do it God’s way, we can give each other a taste of Heaven, right here on earth.

We sacrifice when we deal with anyone else.  If we share an apartment, we give up some of our wants so the other person can share the space.  When we drive, we give up some of the road or we’ll hit other cars.

We sacrifice by giving up not only our former sins when we accept salvation and we give control of our lives to God as we are tempered together with Him (1 Cor. 12:24, Eph. 5:30).  We must align our ambitions and drives with what He wants (2 Cor. 5:14).

Marriage gives up our independent lives.  We must align our ambitions with what God wants and with what our family needs.  We give up control over our lives in marriage as we gave up control to God.

We each work out our own salvation in fear and trembling (Phil. 2:12) as we are tempered together with Christ (1 Cor. 12:24, Eph. 5:30) and with each other.  We work out our marriages as we and our children are tempered together with each other and with Christ.  The best things in life require sacrifice which means dying to self and taking up His cross to follow Him.

Neither salvation nor marriage can work as God ordained unless we die.  Jesus spoke of being born again, Romans 7 4 speaks of dying to our former lives in order to be “married” to Christ.  Jesus said that husband and wife were “no more twain, but one (Mt. 19:6, Mk. 10:8).”  In order to become one as Jesus commanded, each party must die to their former lives in favor of the marriage.

This message explains the sacrificial costs of marriage so people won’t be as surprised.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/the-sacrifice-of-salvation-sacrifice-of.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

A Man’s Unbelief That Harms Marriage

Many highway bridges follow a pattern.  There’s a steel beam across the road.  The beam rests on concrete pillars.  The deck is a cement slab reinforced by steel rods running through it.

Steel and cement are not equal.  Steel is strong in tension, you can pull on it, and it won’t break, but if you push on a steel beam, it bends and buckles.  Most of the load is carried as tension in the lower half of the beam.  Concrete comes apart if you pull on it, but concrete holds a lot when you push.

If you build a bridge on wrong ideas about steel and concrete, your bridge will fall.  Like steel and concrete, women and men have different strengths and weaknesses.  As steel and concrete become one in a reinforced slab which has the best characteristics of both materials, the forces which God created to hold couples together result in a one-flesh unit that stands strong against the pressures of life.

When men and women use these forces improperly, their union is weakened.  A marriage based on wrong ideas about men and women will fall.

This message discusses a common non-Biblical idea held by many men which damages marriages:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/a-mans-unbelief-that-harms-marriages.html

A typical man’s attitude toward taking a woman outside marriage is discussed here:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/a-mans-unbelief-that-harms-marriages.html#lightlyLein

The major doctrinal error is discussed at

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/a-mans-unbelief-that-harms-marriages.html#Gen316

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Women’s Sin that can Destroy a Nation

Many of these articles discuss men’s failures to follow the Word of God in leading their marriages.  We emphasize men because Jesus commanded that men lead their families by serving their wives and children (Mt. 20:25-28, Mk. 9:35, 10:42-45).  Women suffer when men refuse to do that, and the entire family benefits greatly when a man decides to do marriage God’s way.

Women share responsibility for marriage failure.  When the Women’s Liberation movement started in America and in Europe, women said that many men were abusing their leadership.  Instead of working to reform the men, women went to war with men.  This has destroyed many families.

Some of these anti-men teachings have led women into a sin that was condemned by the prophet Ezekiel.  This sin is accelerating the destruction of families in Europe and America.  Churches should take warning and teach everyone to guard against this.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/womans-sin-can-destroy-great-nation.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Loving Others as God Loves Us

The command “love the Lord thy God” appears 9 times in the Bible, 6 times in the Book of Deuteronomy and once each in Matthew, Mark, and Luke.  It lists “with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind.”  We’re to love God with everything we have: Heart, soul, mind, and strength.

The Bible teaches that God loves the world (Jn. 3:16).  Christians accept God’s love, love Him back, and belong to Him.  Paul spoke of “persuading” men of the way of salvation (2 Cor. 5:11).  Christianity is a thinking faith, that’s why “mind” is on the list.  Once we accept God’s offer of salvation on a mixture of thought and faith, we turn our hearts over to Him and the rest follows.

We express love for God through prayer, valuing His Word, and letting the Holy Spirit lead us to do the good works that God expects of us (Titus 2:14, 3:8).  If we don’t open ourselves to Him, if we don’t desire that He know us, we may be rejected:

Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. 22Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? 23And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.  Matthew 7:21-23

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#LovingOthersAsGodLoves

The way God expects us to relate to Him also works for relationships within marriage.  Please improve the article by commenting at the end of the web page.

American Dating Culture Destroys God’s Simple Plan of Marriage

More than 40 years ago, I warned our church teens about dangers of the American dating culture.  I was familiar with arranged marriages in Asia and knew that marriages were more likely to succeed when young people involved their parents in choosing marriage partners.

As American culture spreads via the Internet, Japanese young people are deciding that relationships are too much trouble and aren’t marrying at all.  The American dating scene has led to college kids having casual sex which leads to emotional damage and makes it hard for them to enter into God-honoring marriages.

The burden of teaching falls mostly on parents, so this paper describes the dangers of the American dating culture.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/american-dating-culture-destroys-gods.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Forgiveness is Not Optional for Christians

God planned marriage to illustrate His forgiveness and His grace.  Forgiveness benefits you at least as much as the person you forgive – you become bitter if you don’t forgive, especially if you don’t forgive your spouse.

This article describes two women who forgave monstrous crimes.  One spent years chained to a tree in a jungle being tortured by drug dealers, the other watched her sister die in a concentration camp:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#ForgivenessNotOptional

If they could channel God’s forgiveness of their sins to forgive the evildoers who sinned against them, so can you.  As lost people see married Christians passing God’s love, grace, and forgiveness back and forth to each other, they’ll want God’s forgiveness for themselves.  That’s how we spread the Gospel.  Please improve the article by commenting at the end of the web page.

The Theological Foundations of Marriage

This article explains how our convictions about God built up our marriage.  The examples show how understanding God benefits Christians:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2015/10/the-theological-foundation-for-marriage.html

God warns Christians not to marry non-Christians.  This paper explains core Christian principles that build marriages, but it seems that very few non-Christians are taught how to follow them.

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Salvation and Marriage use the Same Plan

God gave us a simple plan of salvation.  God knew how much trouble we’d have with His plan of salvation.  He knew we couldn’t handle two different plans, one for salvation and another for marriage, so He made one plan work for both.  This paper shows similarities between marriage and salvation to show that they really do follow the same plan.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2014/02/marriage-and-salvation-use-same-plan.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

God's Simple Plan of Marriage

Marriage is very simple, but simple doesn’t mean “easy.”  It’s simple to walk from Maine to California - put one foot in front of the other, repeat until you get there – but it’s not easy.

Marriage really is simple – you either marry to give or you marry to get.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/gods-simple-plan-of-marriage.html

goes into more detail.. Please improve the article by commenting at the end of the web page.

The Holiness of Marriage

God commands His people to be holy:

But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation; Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.  I Peter 1:15-16

God doesn’t ask the impossible.  We can’t make ourselves holy, but the Bible tells us that Christians are holy once we ask Jesus to clean away our sins with His blood (Rev. 1:5, 7:14):

Ye also, as lively stones, are built up a spiritual house, an holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices, acceptable to God by Jesus Christ.  I Peter 2:5

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/holiness-of-marriage.html

discusses the holiness we should strive to weave into marriages.  Please improve the article by commenting at the end of the web page.

Marriage Should Bless Both Parties

One reason there’s so much talk about gay “marriage” is that many believe that traditional marriage has failed.  The Christian divorce rate is outrageous even though Christians know that God intended that one man and one woman marry for life.

When people see that we can’t handle this life, why should they care what we say about the next life?  Divorce wrecks our testimony and dishonors Christ, so it’s important for you to know how to help people fix their marriages.

When someone's lost in the despair of sin, we present "God's Simple Plan of Salvation" which can turn a life around immediately if people believe it.  Similarly, "God's Simple Plan of Marriage" can turn a marriage around immediately if people believe and apply it.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/marriage-should-bless-both-parties.html

lists many resources which can help you help others repair their marriages.

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

What About Divorce?

Having participated in the pain of divorce of kinfolk whom we loved, we didn't want to talk about divorce but "What about Divorce?" kept coming up.  Divorce is as simple a topic as marriage, salvation, and sexual morality.  Salvation is two words, “Only believe.”  Sexual morality is three words, “Only within marriage.”  Marriage is five words, “’Til death do you part.”

Like most of God’s principles, these are very simple to understand and very hard to do.  Christians who want to excuse disobedience to Jesus’ clear commands about marriage have many excuses for divorce.

The Bible is clear that Christian marriage is permanent in the eyes of God.  Jesus told His disciples that everyone would be judged according to how they follow His word:

Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.  Mark 8:38 see also Luke 9:26
He that rejecteth me, and receiveth not my words, hath one that judgeth him: the word that I have spoken, the same shall judge him in the last day.  John 12:48

Many Christians seem to be ashamed of Jesus’ commands about the permanence of marriage – the Christian divorce rate is nearly the same as among non-Christians.  When lost people see that we can’t handle this life any better than they can, they don’t care what we say about the life to come.

This message is rather long because it must outline the many excuses people use to “justify” ending Holy Matrimony and joining together physically with someone else.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/what-about-divorce.html

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

When A Young Man pursues your daughter, what will you tell him you expect from her husband?

Pr. 31:1 shows that King Lemuel’s mother taught him how to nourish and cherish his future wife.  Working mothers don’t have time to do that so few Christian men know how to bless your daughter.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#pursuing

lists Biblical principles for helping a young man make your daughter happy enough for both of them to receive the joy God intended for both parties when He instituted marriage.

A wife can make her husband no happier than he makes her (Ecc. 9:9).  How happy do you want your son-in-law to be?

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Discussion Points for Couples

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/discussion-points-for-couples.html

discusses how a man and woman can decide what to do and what not to do while dating.  It lists Bible verses which suggest many things a woman may desire from her husband.  It's organized as discussion points so that couples can discuss the Bible to figure out whether they should marry and how best to order their lives as they glorify God together after they marry.

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

Husbands Leading Wives in Exploring God's Plan for Marriage

This article amplifies Discussion Points for Couples with more verses.  Studying the Bible together is one of the best ways for a couple to draw closer to each other as they draw closer to God.

God created men and women with different points of view.  A woman’s brain has more nerves connecting the left and right halves of her brain; a man has more nerves connecting the front of his brain to the back.  The ratio of gray matter to white matter is different in men and in women.  We don’t understand how the brain works well enough to know what this means, but it’s obvious that men and women’s brains are different.  It should not surprise us to find out that men and women think differently.

Honestly exploring how husband and wife have different views of Bible passages enriches both parties.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#discussionPoints

Men Push Hard for Sex When Women Don’t Say “No!”

This article uses current events without mentioning the Bible to show the disaster caused by our society’s obsession with pretending that men and women have the same needs and desires.

Men want women and women want to be wanted.  The both seek joy in coming together.  It isn’t working.  Instead of happiness, they bring each other pain.  A woman dated a famous comedian.  He took her home for sex.  He was astonished to learn how miserable she was – it never occurred to him that she had any other reason to date!

This article suggests a way a woman can explain her desires in a way that ought to make a man be interested in her other valuable characteristics.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/men-push-hard-for-sex-when-women-dont.html

This note uses a story from Genesis to explain an unsaved man’s attitude toward forced sex:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#lightlyLien

What Do Women Desire?

Christians disagree over the meaning of Gen. 3:16:  Some say that a wife desires to serve her husband and make him glad he married her; others say that a wife desires to usurp her husband’s leadership role.  Commentators forget that the Hebrew word translated “desire” is used when the wife in the Song of Solomon rejoices that “his desire is toward me (Song 7:10)”

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/what-do-women-desire.html

goes into detail by building on what the Bible teaches about wives:

Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD. Proverbs 18:22
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.  The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.  She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.  Proverbs 31:10-12
she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.  I Corinthians 7:34b

Toy or Treasure

There are two ways a girl can interact with a guy: 1) she can be his toy or 2) she can be his treasure.  You've seen a little boy play with a truck.  He pushes it this way and that, then, when he gets tired of it, he throws it away and grabs another toy.

It’s hard on girls when boys get tired of them and throw them away.  It is very wrong for a man to toy with a woman, but a lot of women permit this, so boys keep doing it.  Being discarded is hard on women; the book "Unprotected" by Miriam Grossman explains biological reasons why this is so.

The only type of relationship that makes sense for a woman is a long-term commitment.  This will help you avoid coming across as a toy.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/toy-or-treasure.html

The Perils of Premature Perception and Proclamation of Pairing

High school kids sometimes see couples forming when they haven’t.  Playing boy-girl games when you aren't ready to marry is like playing with matches and gasoline when you don’t want to start a fire.  We told our sons, "When you can't pay, all you can do is play."  Women aren’t toys.  Playing before you're mature enough to take each other seriously can lead to great emotional damage.

There are only 3 possible outcomes:

1) You can break up.  This will hurt, but it teaches you that breaking up is possible, which lays the foundation for divorce later.

2) You can marry before you're ready.  Mature adults have troubles with the duties and responsibilities of marriage, and it’s far harder on younger people.

3) You can get involved physically, which adds to the emotional risk.

The teens and early twenties are a time for striving to learn to become productive, responsible adults; it's not a time to wish you were already grown up.  There are more details here:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/perils-of-premature-proclamation-of.html

Any boy can play with a woman; only a man can nourish and cherish her as a treasure.  Girls must grow up enough to insist on being treated as treasures and wait for the guys to grow up enough to do it.

What Evolution and History Teach About Marriage

This talk was given at a secular school where mentioning the Bible was forbidden.  The school was so committed to the idea of evolution that no other ideas could be discussed.  This paper discusses marriage from an evolutionary point of view, but the answers come out the same.

It doesn’t matter what’s politically correct, it doesn’t matter how you’d like marriage to be, you have to base your marriage on facts about the nature of men and women or your marriage will fall.  This gives some facts you can use to persuade people that the Bible is totally realistic about marriage.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/what-evolution-and-history-teach-about.html

Most of the class realized that we had been discussing Bible-based marriage.

Parents and Churches Must Uphold Marriage

Parents and churches didn’t have to teach the permanence of marriage in the past because our society required long-term marriages.  Divorce was difficult until the State of California passed the first no-fault divorce law in 1971.  It’s now easier to get out of a marriage contract than to get out of paying for a refrigerator – either party can walk out for any reason or for no reason.

Given that our society no longer supports marriage commitments, churches and parents must teach that Godly marriages offer the couple a taste of the joys of heaven and have a profound effect on how well children’s lives turn out.

The Wedding Wisdom booklet helps parents or older couples teach the simplicity of Christian marriage which gives both parties a taste of the joys of heaven - the Bible explains it in one verse:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html

Pastors say they can’t find a good premarital counseling material.  Sound Bite Marriage will stimulate 4 to 6 hours of discussion of the simplicity of marriage as God defined it.  The goal is to get the couple talking enough to see how differently they think before marriage so they know to be patient and kind all their days:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/sound-bite-marriage.html

They’re both available as paperback and Kindle books on our author page:
https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/
or you can download the WeddingWisdom.doc and SoundBiteMarriage.doc from this shared folder:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing 

Feel free to use the material in any way that serves His cause!

Is What I want to do the Will of God

This article lists Biblical principles for deciding whether what you plan to do is what God would want you to do:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/is-what-i-want-to-do-will-of-god.html

The Many Ways Jesus Turned the World Upside-Down

The Empty Tomb wasn’t Jesus’ only surprise – His gospel changed the world so radically that Thessalonican unbelievers complained “These that have turned the world upside down are come hither also (Acts 17:6)” and started a riot.

This short paper lists many radical changes He brought.  This should remind us how to proclaim the world upside-down!

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#upsideDown

Please improve the article by commenting on the web site.

Jesus Gently Encouraged the Apostle Peter’s Spiritual Growth

Jesus loved the Apostle Peter and encouraged him over and over in spite of Peter’s many failings.  Peter’s spiritual growth and Jesus’ encouragement tell us how gently Jesus treats us and shows us how we should treat others as they work out their own salvation.

Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.  Philippians 2:12

Nobody can get to heaven on your or my convictions, each person needs their own.  None of us can get to heaven on Peter’s convictions, but thinking about Jesus’ gentle encouragement to Peter teaches us to be patient as others grow in Christ.

And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, 25In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth;  II Timothy 2:24-25

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/jesus-gently-encouraged-apostle-peters.html

My Favorite Easter message - the Gospel of Jesus Death, Resurrection, Grace, Forgiveness, and Salvation in 2 Words – “and Peter”

We can sum up the entire Gospel in just two words – “and Peter.”  Peter denied Jesus three times and felt terrible.  After His resurrection, Jesus had the angel tell the women to be sure to include Peter in order to draw him back into the group of disciples, AND HE WENT FISHING INSTEAD!  Jesus went and drew him back in AGAIN!  Jesus wants to draw everyone else in as well, and we get the privilege of telling them!

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/the-gospel-of-jesus-death-resurrection.html

What Drove Jesus’ 11 Nobodies to Turn the World Upside-down?

Starting with eleven fired-up nobodies (Acts 4:13), Jesus’ gospel turned the world upside-down (Acts 17:6).  Over the next 300 years, half the Roman population converted to Christianity or was sympathetic.

How did this happen?

… there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.  Galatians 3:28b

Christianity respects and values women far more than other faiths or cultures.

And the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom.  Mark 15:3

WhatDroveJesus11NobodiesTurnWorldUpsideDown.doc is available for free from our shared folder:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing

We set the price as low as Amazon would permit - 99 cents on Kindle:

https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

The Bible commands that women be given weeks of physical rest after giving birth.  We send new mothers home from the hospital in a day or two and expect them to get right back to work.  Are modern ideas always better than old wisdom?

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#restAfterBirth

When men plan, they tend to focus on the Big Picture, but women are creatures of minute detail.  These 2 paragraphs show how many details a wife needs to know for a simple outing:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#picnic

The Simplicity of Marriage

God made all things.  He has “creator’s rights,” He sets the rules.  God made both salvation and marriage.  If you try to get to Heaven your own way instead of God’s way, you go to Hell when you die.  If you try your own way of marriage instead of God’s way, you can make life Hell on earth.

By the time my wife and I were married in 1971, most of our friends were already divorced.  We soon realized that God had given us something precious in our marriage but we could not explain it.  We had nothing to say when her sister and my brother divorced and we wanted to help others avoid the pain.

We spent the next 45 years trying to explain what God had in mind when He made marriage so that others could enjoy the blessing God wants to give when a man and a woman enter into Holy Matrimony.  Everyone knows people whose marriages are in trouble or young people who are thinking of marrying.

If you meet someone whose life is lost in sin and despair, you know how to give God’s Simple Plan of Salvation.  This article explains that marriage is also simple.  This should equip you to help others find the joy God offers through marriage.  All of marriage can be summed up in just two words:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#onlyPraise

How to be God’s Friend

God knew we could handle only one plan so He made one plan work for both salvation and marriage.  He also knew we would have so much trouble relating to Him that He made one pattern work for relating to Him and for relating to our spouses.

Moses and Abraham were friends of God.  God was glad they choose to be His friends.  God wants each of us to choose to be His friend.  If husband and wife are each a friend of God and relate to Him as He desires, it is a lot easier for them to belong to each other as God expects.  We become a friend of God by being a friend to each other; we serve God by serving each other.  This talk explains how to be God’s friend.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/how-to-be-gods-friend-ii-chronicles-207.html

Relating to God by Loving God

Loving God is the only way to relate to Him.  The command “love the Lord thy God” appears 9 times in the Bible, 6 times in the Book of Deuteronomy and once each in Matthew, Mark, and Luke.  It lists “with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind.”  We’re to love God with everything we have: Heart, soul, mind, and strength.

The Bible teaches that God loves the world (Jn. 3:16).  Christians accept God’s love, love Him back, and belong to Him.  Christianity is a thinking faith, that’s why “mind” is on the list.  Paul spoke of “persuading” men to accept salvation (2 Cor. 5:11).  Once we accept God’s offer of salvation on a mixture of conviction and faith, we turn our hearts over to Him and the rest follows.

We express love for God through prayer, valuing His Word, and letting the Holy Spirit lead us to do the good works that God expects of us (Titus 2:14, 3:8).  If we don’t open ourselves to Him, if we don’t desire that He know us, we may be rejected:

Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. 22Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? 23And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.  Matthew 7:21-23

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/relating-to-god-by-loving-god.html

The way God expects us to relate to Him also works for relationships in marriage and in the church.

Comparative Religion - Comparing Christianity with Other Religions

“Religion” is as a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, especially when considered as the creation of a superhuman agency or agencies, usually involving devotional and ritual observances, and often containing a moral code governing the conduct of human affairs.

Religious or not, we act on what we believe, we base our actions on faith.  We drive cars in faith that bridges won’t fall.  Some people are wrong about that; faith can be misplaced and die when a bridge falls.  Thus, “religion” means belief in one God or in many gods as the superhuman agency of creation.  Secularism is the opposite of religion and holds that the entire universe and all its wonders came about through chance.

Religions can be compared by asking 5 questions:  TC or IDIF or CGB or QC or L? and GBI?  What we believe determines what we do.  The critical religious question is, are we free to do as we like or should we take God’s views into account?  What we believe about God determines what we do.  Do we follow our plan or do we base our lives on doing our best to follow His plan?

This message discusses these questions to show how Christianity differs from other religions, then shows how Christian principles should direct us in how we manage our marriages.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/comparing-christianity-with-other.html

Boaz Did Not Redeem Ruth

Many sermons call Boaz the “kinsman redeemer.”  Some describe him as a type of Christ who redeemed Ruth, who was not of God’s people, into the body of believers.

Boaz had nothing to do with Ruth joining God’s people.  Ruth chose to follow God when Naomi told her to return to her family to find a husband (Ruth 1:16).  This paper shows why marrying Ruth caused Boaz to be remembered forever:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#notRedeemer

God Tells You How to Prosper

Accepting salvation doesn’t guarantee that you’ll get rich in material things, but the Bible tells you how to behave to maximize the prosperity that God will be able to give you based on His plans for your life.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/god-tells-you-how-to-prosper.html

Adam Refused to Ask for God’s Forgiveness and Brought Sin on Us All

When God asked Adam if he had eaten the forbidden fruit, Adam blamed Eve instead of confessing his sin (Gen. 3:11-12).  I John 1:9 tells us that if we “confess our sins,” He will not only forgive our sins, He will clean the sin off us.  Adam wouldn’t do that, he couldn’t be cleansed, so “all have sinned.”

For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;  Romans 3:23
Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:  Romans 5:12

The idea of collective responsibility in that we are all involved in Adam’s sin is foreign to individualistic Americans.  The Word of God shows that God thinks in terms of collective responsibility.

The message shows how Daniel, Ezra, and Nehemiah taught us to confess not only our own sins, but the sins of our ancestors and others around us.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/adam-would-not-ask-for-gods-forgiveness.html

God’s Pattern for Human History

By the time Solomon wrote that there was nothing new under the sun (Ecc. 1:9), God’s pattern of using other nations to chasten Israel and punishing those nations afterward had been established from the time of the exodus from Egypt through the book of Judges.

Many have tried to wipe out the Jews, but God protects His people.  The Old Testament shows God helping leaders build human empires, keeping them as long as they serve His purpose, and letting them fall when they no longer serve His plan.  God keeps using the same pattern to carry out His purpose ever since Old Testament times including the ongoing conflicts in the Middle East.

History and the Bible show that God judges nations on how they treat His people.

Britain promised Jews a homeland after a Jewish chemist found a better way to make gunpowder during WW I.  Instead, the British sent many fleeing Jews back to Germany where they were killed.  God shut down the British Empire when it no longer served His purposes.  Nazis killed millions of Jews before and during WW II.  German cities were destroyed and their nation was split into East and West.

The Middle East war is a family quarrel: Jews are descended from Sarah, Abraham's 1st wife, and Muslims from Hagar, his 2nd wife.  The Chinese write ‘trouble’ as ‘Two Women Under One Roof.”

Generations of tyrants - Assyrians, Babylonians, Philistines, Russians, Romans, Mongols, Germans, and now Muslims - have tried to exterminate Jews.  The fact that Jews still exist after so many pogroms is evidence for the existence of God.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#planRedemption

discusses great empires God helped build up and wrote off when they no longer protected His Jews.  Is America following the same path?  Certain factions want America to abandon God’s people.  History shows that harming Jews isn’t a good idea.

What the Bible Teaches About Leadership

The Bible teaches that husbands should lead their wives, but how do they do it?  Jesus commanded His people to lead by serving others:

If any man desire to be first, the same shall be last of all and servant of all  Mark 9:35
But Jesus called them to him, and saith unto them, Ye know that they which are accounted to rule over the Gentiles exercise lordship over them; and their great ones exercise authority upon them. But so shall it not be among you: but whosoever will be great among you, shall be your minister: and whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be servant of all. For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.  Mark 10:42

That’s the secret of leadership – a Godly leader serves his people.  A man serves his wife, a mother serves her children, a military leader takes care of his men, and a boss takes care of his people. Those who want to lead the most should serve the most.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/what-bible-teaches-about-leadership.html

shows many examples of how God leads His people in detail.

How Many Commands did Jesus give us?

Jesus commanded us to teach all nations to observe all things whatsoever He commanded us (Mt. 28:19-20).  How many commands is that?

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/jesus-expects-us-to-teach-everything-he.html

has a list of commands which He inspired holy men of God to write in the New Testament (2 Peter 1:21).  There are more than 650 with duplications.

This list has 1,050 commands:

https://www.abc.net.au/reslib/201407/r1308729_17984331.pdf

These commands are important.  Jesus will judge us by how closely we follow His word:

And if any man hear my words, and believe not, I judge him not: for I came not to judge the world, but to save the world. 48He that rejecteth me, and receiveth not my words, hath one that judgeth him: the word that I have spoken, the same shall judge him in the last day.  John 12:47-48

God Wrote the Bible to be Read from Many Points of View

These four articles are in one DavidnGoliath.doc file in the shared folder
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing

One of the amazing things about the Bible is that any story can be read on so many levels.  God used David mightily and we should want God to use us in a mighty way.  This article tells why God was able to use David to help us get ready for God to use us.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/04/how-david-prepared-himself-to-serve-god.html

This discusses the story from the point of view of how family members get along or don’t.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/04/the-david-story-illustrates-family.html

The story of David and Goliath shows that in the very first recorded example of an army hiring a civilian contractor, the contractor didn’t get paid even though he performed on time and under budget.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/04/the-david-and-goliath-story-shows-how.html

King Saul’s offer to anyone who killed Goliath included marrying the king’s daughter.  Was this good for her?  This article describes Biblical fathers who did not protect their daughters from evil men.  God gave us many stories of human behavior in the Old Testament “for your learning.”  We should learn from these accounts of how their decisions worked out so we don’t recycle the same old mistakes!

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#fathersFail

It was the church, not society, which redefined marriage away

As morality collapsed and hookup culture took over the college scene, we thought that the church was following 25 years behind society in accepting sexual immorality.  This short paper explains how the church led the redefinition and destruction of marriage back in 1950 and society followed:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#noMarriage

Please improve it by commenting at the end of the web page.

It was the church, not society, that led in the destruction of the American justice system

The American justice system of innocent until proven guilty and guilt or innocence determined by a jury of ordinary citizens instead of the rulers was based on the “diligent inquisition” required of the justice system in the Bible.  We’ve seen our justice system become polluted by political considerations, but the church abandoned the pursuit of justice as required by the Bible long before the courts started falling apart.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#noJustice

Please comment at the bottom of the post.

The desire of rulers to own all the land and to get total control of all their subjects goes back at least to 1700 BC.  This short article shows how Joseph helped Pharaoh end up owning all the land, animals, and citizens of Egypt during the 7 years of famine that followed the 7 good years and gives other examples of ungodly power-grabs:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#ownEverything

American politicians “never let a crisis go to waste” and increase their power over all aspects of our lives for every problem that comes up, either real or imagined.

For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.  I Timothy 6:10

Using the Bible when Making Decisions

Coca-Cola introduced New Coke after giving samples to many people, spending a lot of money on studies, and the product failed utterly.  All their facts didn't help them see that Coke fans didn’t want change no matter what people thought of the new flavor.  When they asked if people liked the new flavor, they forgot to ask would it be OK to replace Old Coke with New Coke.  The answer to that question was “No!”

They had lots of facts, but it wasn’t a fact-based issue; customers had an emotional tie to Old Coke.

Many decisions don’t tie to facts.  Whom should we marry?  How should we raise children?  Would it be okay for this child to visit that friend?  Which TV programs should we watch, if any?  Which books should be in our home?  Should our kids have Facebook or email?  Does this child need discipline, an explanation, or both?  We can share experiences with other parents and church members, but these high-value decisions are made without facts because we can’t know how such decisions will turn out.  We need what the Bible calls “wisdom.”

This paper is a list of questions you should ask yourself when making an important decision.  Each one has a list of Bible verses to help illuminate your choice:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#willOfGod

False Gods Worshipped Today

There are two false gods worshipped in our land: the bully god and the buddy god. The false bully god wrote a bunch of rules in the Bible to keep people from having fun and watches all the time so he can whack you if you get out of line. A man who thinks god’s a bully tends to bully his wife no matter how she tries to please him, a woman who believes in the bully god thinks her husband’s bullying her no matter how he tries to nourish and cherish her through Bible-based leadership.

The false buddy god, in contrast, is so loving that he’d never send anyone to Hell or let anyone suffer trials.  People who believe in the buddy god don’t honor God’s holiness or take His principles seriously. They have trouble submitting their will and their pride to God’s plan for marriage or for anything else.  This pleases Satan, causes the one true God a great deal of pain, and hurts His reputation:

O that there were such an heart in them, that they would fear me, and keep all my commandments always, that it might be well with them, and with their children for ever!  Deuteronomy 5:29

God knew we could handle only one plan so He made one plan work for both salvation and marriage.  He also knew we would have so much trouble relating to Him that He made one pattern work for relating to Him and for relating between spouses and other church members.

Moses and Abraham were friends of God.  God was glad they chose to be His friends.  God wants each of us to choose to be His friend.  If husband and wife are each friends of God and relate to Him as He desires, it is a lot easier for them to belong to each other as God expects.  We become a friend of God by being a friend to each other; we serve God by serving each other.  This talk explains how to be God’s friend.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2004/12/are-you-gods-friend.html

discusses some advantages of becoming a friend of the One True God as Abraham and Moses did.

God’s Concern for the Fatherless

The fatherless are mentioned 43 times in the Bible - that's a lot!  His command to “Love one another” appears only 12 times even though having His people love each other is extremely important to God.  His command, “Love the LORD thy God” appears only 9 times.  Is God more concerned that His people treat the fatherless properly than whether they love each other or Him?

The Word of God mentions “orphan” only once.  Being fatherless is nearly as bad as having no parents at all!  God also understands that widows have a hard time:

We are orphans and fatherless, our mothers are as widows.  Lamentations 5:3

English is the international money language.  If you’re running an orphanage, you can use Google Translate to translate these verses into your language one at a time and use them to teach English while giving orphans confidence that God is concerned about them even when very few people seem to care.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/gods-concern-for-fatherless.html

God’s Simple Plan for Reconciliation

God cannot accomplish His purposes in the local church if the Body of Believers is divided or in schism.

That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another.  I Corinthians 12:25
Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation; and a house divided against a house fallethLuke 11:17b

God gave us a simple way to make peace whenever someone becomes offended.  When people in a family, church, or business office don’t do what God commands to heal offenses, resentment builds up.  People forget why they’re upset; they just remember that they’re angry without knowing why.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#reconciliation

What’s described in the article is routine in Japan and has worked in America for bringing groups into one accord.  Will it work in different cultures?  Please help make it better by asking questions or making suggestions.

Having Answers About our Hope in God and in Marriage

God requires that we explain why we trust God in marriage and in our daily Christian walk:

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:  I Peter 3:15

By the time we married in 1971, many of our friends and colleagues were already divorced.  We started studying the Bible to learn how to build marriages, but when my wife’s sister divorced and my brother divorced, we had nothing to say.  This paper explains our answer; please help us make it better:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2015/12/having-answer-about-marriage.html

Illogical Blends Found in Scripture

Many atheists complain that the Bible is illogical.  This should be no surprise:

But we preach Christ crucified, unto the Jews a stumblingblock, and unto the Greeks foolishness; But unto them which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God.  I Corinthians 1:23-24

The book of Galatians shows Jews that their life-long practice of following the law was not a means of salvation; it merely showed their need for Christ (Galatians 3:24-25).  They’d also have to admit that their eagerly-awaited and long-promised Messiah had come, and they’d missed Him.

It’s foolishness to Greeks because of the logical thinking built into the structure of the Greek language.  Jesus being both God and man is impossible by Greek rules of logic.  God and man cannot be blended together.

This paper shows how Greek logic doesn’t match Scripture.  This is a problem with Greek thought, not with God, of course.  It discusses many other illogical, that is, non-Greek, blends found in the Bible.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/illogical-blends-in-scripture.html

Calvinism

Calvinism is the simple idea that human choice has NOTHING to do with salvation: God decides who will go to Heaven and who will go to Hell no matter what they do.  Calvinism makes Jesus Christ a liar:

O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, which killest the prophets, and stonest them that are sent unto thee; how often would I have gathered thy children together, as a hen doth gather her brood under her wings, and ye would not!  Luke 13:34

Calvinism means that Jesus lied in mourning that they wouldn’t choose to follow Him because they could not – God had already chosen some of them for Hell and they couldn’t choose to accept His offer of salvation.

Calvinism means that the Lord God also lied:

Say unto them, As I live, saith the Lord GOD, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked; but that the wicked turn from his way and live: turn ye, turn ye from your evil ways; for why will ye die, O house of Israel?  Ezekiel 33:1, read the entire chapter!

The Lord God lied in urging them to turn from their wicked ways because He had chosen some for Hell and they couldn’t turn.  John the Baptist and the other Old Testament prophets also lied in urging repentance.

The word “predestination” is in the Bible, but this paper shows how the Calvinistic idea of double predestination is against the Word of God:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/illogical-blends-in-scripture.html#errorDoublePre

Here’s a refutation of TULIP, the 5 points of Calvinism:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/an-examination-of-tulip-five-points-of.html

The more scientists study the one-direction flow of time, the less they understand it.  God gave hints.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/illogical-blends-in-scripture.html#blendTime

This paper shows how prayer blends the natural actions of men with the supernatural actions of God.  We labor together with God when we pray (1 Cor. 3:9):

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/illogical-blends-in-scripture.html#blendOfPrayer

Teaching Aids

The marriage site https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/ has material to help teach Christian ideas to new believers or children.  Some of the material has been published as books which are available from this author page:

https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

We’ve posted audio files of some talks in a public Google Drive folder and plan to post more:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing 
It also holds .doc files for the messages.  If you have an English-teaching ministry, students can listen to the talks while reading them.

Easy Believism

Churches have been plagued by people being told that all they need to do to go to Heaven is to pray for Jesus’ salvation.  They’ll cite this verse:

For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.  Romans 10:13

That’s true, but John 3:16, the best-known verse in the Bible, shows that belief is also needed:

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.  John 3:16
He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life: and he that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him.  John 3:36

Such people find that the “salvation” they were promised doesn’t give them any peace.  This paper

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/do-well-meaning-people-keep-assuring.html

goes into the detailed requirements for salvation and shows the Biblical way to deal with doubt.

All Things are Possible

These short devotionals were written in 1977 and 1980 by my wife’s pastor who gave us marriage counseling in June and July of 1971.  His observations and predictions have come true!  In particular, see the section “Alternatives.”  Some of them would make good starting points for sermons, lessons, or discussions.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/all-things-are-possible.html

Winning the Lost

God chose to give His people responsibility for telling lost people how to be saved:

Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: 20Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.  Matthew 28:19-20
And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature. 16He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.  Mark 16:15-16

This message gives some common objections lost people use to try to justify not hearing God’s message from you when you try to plant and water so He can give the increase.  These hints may help you get further when you find someone whom God has drawn.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/winning-lost.html

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/jesus-expects-us-to-teach-everything-he.html  has a list of His commands.  There are more than 650 with duplications.

It’s futile to pray that God will fix our government.  If enough people accept Christ, THEY can turn our nation around.

Teaching the Bible Through 150 Questions

Discussing these 150 questions which were assembled in the 1640s will help you help people answer these 4 questions every Christian should be able to answer:

Who is Jesus to you?  Jesus most vital question was, “But whom say ye that I am? (Mt. 16:15, Mk. 8:29, Lk. 9:20)”  The Apostle Peter answered, “Thou art the Christ, the Son of the Living God (Mt. 16:16, Mk. 8:29).”  That is the most important question for everyone, Christian or not.

Where do you find truth?  Many stopped following Jesus (Jn. 6:66).  He asked, “Will ye also go away (Jn. 6:67)?”  Peter replied, “Lord, to whom shall we go? Thou hast the words of eternal life (Jn. 6:68).”  Christians know that only Jesus spoke truth about eternal life and that we must cling to Him and to His Words (Mk. 8:38, Lk. 9:26).  We must persuade people that the Bible is worthy of honor, respect, study, and obedience because it’s from God (2 Cor. 5:11).

Why did they want to kill Jesus?  Jesus did not sin, He healed, He fed people, and He taught truth.  Knowing why the religious authorities killed Him explains most of government (Jn. 11:48).  There are only two sides: Jesus’ and Satan’s (Mt. 12:30, Lk. 11:23).  If someone doesn’t show the good fruit of being on Jesus’ side, we judge that they’re on Satan’s side (Mt. 7:15-20) from their bad fruit.  Many governments try to destroy churches and Christians – Satan hates Jesus and His people, so Satan’s people hate us (Jn. 15:18, 25).

Do you have an Attitude of Gratitude?  Moses warned that the Jews would lose everything unless they loved God with grateful hearts with thanks for everything He gave them (De. 28:47-48).  Are you grateful?

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/teaching-bible-through-150-questions.html#questions

150QuestionsTeachBible.doc is available for free from the same folder as all the other marriage material
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing

It’s also available from Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

We set the price as low as Amazon would permit - 99 cents on Kindle.

How do you plan to disciple them?  Discussing these 150 questions which were assembled in the 1640s will help you teach new believers how to grow in Christ:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/teaching-bible-through-150-questions.html#questions

Don’t Step in the Holes

The Old Testament tells how men and women managed their families and how priests, kings, and other leaders handled power.  This book focuses on what God wants us to know about the choices people made and how their decisions worked out for them, their children, and their followers.

We hide God’s Word in our hearts (Ps. 119:11) to avoid sin and to learn from others’ experiences:

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.  Proverbs 1:7

Some people can learn by reading about what happened to other people, some by talking to others about their experiences, and some simply must grab the electric fence for themselves.  Strive to learn the Fear of the Lord and the mind of God from the Word of God instead of having to repeat every mistake for yourself.

This book draws on the “ensamples” in the Old Testament to help you avoid the many holes along the pathways of life.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html

Samson yielded to his temptations and fell into a hole:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#samsonTemptation

Isaiah was very critical of what the people were doing, but he also offered encouragement.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#comfortYe  

There’s a Jewish tradition that Lemuel is another name for Solomon which would mean that Proverbs 31 came from Bathsheba, Solomon’s mother.  The Bible gives reasons to doubt that.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#notSolomon

This is a series of marriage-related Bible topics which a husband and wife should discuss together.  Drawing nigh to God draws them close to each other!

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html#closer

Old Testament Survey – What God Gave “For Our Learning” *

Christians are tempted to speak of “The God of the Old Testament” and “the God of the New Testament” as if they were two different Gods.  It is true that Moses’ law passed away when Jesus fulfilled it perfectly and that the Old Testament doesn’t say anything about the church, but salvation has always been by grace through faith (Rom. 4:3, Gal. 3:6, Jam. 2:23).

Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever.  Hebrews 13:8
For I am the LORD, I change not;.  Malachi 3:6a
For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus;  I Timothy 2:5

The Old Testament and New Testaments describe one God who has not changed, but the New Testament revealed many mysteries that were not revealed to God’s people until after Jesus’ birth.  We know more about God than the Jews did and we are given the Holy Spirit.  God holds us to a higher standard.

The wisdom God put in the Old Testament can save you from many wrong choices.  OT outlines generally focus on God’s plan of redemption and on God’s sovereignty.  Ours focuses on what God wanted us to know about decisions people made and how their decisions worked out for them and for their children.

For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hopeRomans 15:4

Every detail of every choice people made and how it worked out for them will help us make proper choices so that God can bless us.  There is no honor in recycling old mistakes, but we see Christians making the same bad choices God’s people made thousands of years ago, generation after generation.

Some people can learn by reading about what happened to other people, others by talking to others about their experiences, and some people simply must grab the electric fence for themselves.  You should learn the Fear of the Lord and the mind of God from the Word of God as He intended without having to repeat every mistake for yourself.  We must seek the mind of God and the will of God in every detail of our lives.  This not only avoids mistakes, it opens us to God’s blessing.

Every detail of what people chose to do and how their choices worked out was given by God to help us succeed in our walk with Him by glorifying Him.  Learn from Him!  Don’t grab the electric fence of life!

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/dont-step-in-holes.html

DontStepinTheHoles.doc is available from this shared folder.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing

It is also available from Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

We set the price as low as Amazon would permit – 99 cents on Kindle.

Wedding Wisdom

God’s people have been marrying and being given in marriage for many generations.  God loves men and women equally (Gal. 3:28).  He loved us enough to send His son to die to take the punishment for our sins.

It’s silly to think that a God who loved us that much would create men and women so that marriage couldn’t work.  He’d create us so that marriage should bless both parties but, like salvation, we have to conduct marriage according to His rules.

Trying to get to Heaven in our own way sends us to hell when we die.  Trying to do marriage our own way can make life Hell on earth.

Having sent His Son to die to make it possible for us to have the Fruit of the Spirit to bring us joy in this life, God also inspired men to write instructions for marriage in His Word.  This document summarizes Wedding Wisdom.  It’s meant to be given to engaged couples or to a couple who’s thinking of getting engaged to help them avoid age-old mistakes.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html

WeddingWisdom.doc is available from this shared folder
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing

It’s also available from Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

We set the price as low as Amazon would permit – 99 cents on Kindle.

God ordained both salvation and marriage.  This note explains how similar God made them.  He knew we’d have enough trouble with His plan of salvation that we couldn’t possibly handle two plans, so He made one plan work for both.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html#origin

The Song of Songs was written 3,000 years ago to give us specific examples of how husband and wife should behave toward each other:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html#song  

God warns His people that we’ll lose all the blessings of all His gifts to us if we don’t let Him know how much we appreciate them.  We won’t lose salvation, but we can certainly lose the blessing of marriage without an Attitude of Gratitude

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html#gratitude

The Marriage Arch is held up by two sides which meet in the middle – the husband eagerly receives his wife’s speech, and she eagerly receives his seed.  The marriage is weakened if either party neglects the other’s need.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html#marriageArch

David’s heart with perfect with the Lord his God.  All Israel come with one perfect heart to make David King.  God expects that husband and wife will enter Holy Matrimony with one perfect heart and keep their hearts perfect with each other all their days.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html#perfectHeartSpouse

There is a difference between head knowledge and heart knowledge.  Many men will say that they believe that Adam caused the fall, but then they’ll blame their wives for anything that goes wrong!  This article shows that a man must accept Adam’s failure of leadership caused the fall in his heart before he can fulfill the servant leadership role that God expects of him.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/wedding-wisdom-simplicity-of-marriage.html#fallFault

What God Said About Marriage

WhatGodSaidAboutMarriage.pdf is available from the same folder as all the other marriage material
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing

This 323 page book is also available through Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

We set the price as low as Amazon would permit – 99 cents on Kindle.

Why we use the King James Bible (KJB)

And if any man hear my words, and believe not, I judge him not: for I came not to judge the world, but to save the world. 48He that rejecteth me, and receiveth not my words, hath one that judgeth him: the word that I have spoken, the same shall judge him in the last day.  John 12:47-48

Jesus’ words will judge us so it’s important to know exactly what God said.  This is a 2-page explanation why we use the King James Bible instead of one of the “modern” versions:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/two-page-explanation-of-why-we-use-king.html

God expects us to live by faith, so there can’t be any PROOF of important questions such as God’s very existence, how He created the universe, and which Bible version is the Word of God.  This one-pager looks at what God has revealed about Himself to show that the King James Bible is what God wanted His English-speaking servants to have.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#byFaith

This is the heart of the doctrinal question whether to use the King James Bible or a newer version:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#heart

It summarizes the issue.

This article explains that the controversy between those who favor the KJB and modernists who prefer new versions which use different manuscripts is based on a false assumption about how the King James Bible was produced:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#controversy

This explains Satan’s plan to stir up heretics to question the Word of God:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#hereticGoal

Oldest Manuscript

The KJB translators drew on a Greek manuscript called the “Received Text” or Textus Receptus (TR) which has been traced back to apostolic times.  Modernists say the Codex Sinaiticus and Vaticanus manuscripts promoted by Westcott and Hort in the late 1800s were hidden in the 4th century and “recovered” in the 19th.  They are the oldest manuscripts, they say, so a translation based on them is “better” than the KJB.  They are filled with errors, crossouts, and disagree with each other 3,000 times in the gospels alone.

In addition to being hidden for more than 1,000 years, the manuscripts from which new versions come are of exceptionally poor quality.  This discusses their many corrections and erasures to show that what “scholars” like Westcott and Hort and other anti-KJB people call the “best manuscripts” cannot be the Word of God.  They contain parts of the Word of God, but can’t be trusted to reveal the whole counsel of God (Acts 20:27):

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#oldestManuscript

The Codex Sinaiticus and Vaticanus manuscripts from which modern versions are translated fail God’s condition for Biblical authority because they were not continually available.  Modernists argue that God allowed His Word to be lost for 1,500 years until scholars “recovered” it.  To accept this idea, we must ignore many Scripture passages or believe that God lied when He promised to preserve His Word generation by generation forever.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#howWeReceived

Lessons of History

This section shows how recent history shows that the King James Bible is the one that should be used.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#lessonsOfHistory

Christians stopped memorizing the Word of God as so many versions brought confusion about what God said.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#memorization

The Bible tells us that we’re not supposed to move ancient landmarks (Pr. 22:8), but the question of which Bible version Christians should trust has been an issue since the 1880s.  “Fake news” may seem easier to understand, but we need to study the pure words of God.

God gave us the Bible to teach us how to be saved (Jn. 3:16-18) so that we can produce the Fruit of the Spirit in this life (Gal. 5:22, Eph. 5:9), win the lost (Mt. 28:19-20, Mk. 16:15-16), and live forever in Heaven with Him in the next life.  Satan confused Eve by asking “hath God said (Gen. 3:1)” and tries to corrupt our minds from the “simplicity that is in Christ (2 Cor. 11:3).”  This short article explains why we must use the KJB which properly explains the mind of God.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#controversy

Imperfect Jesus

The Bible tells us that we’re not supposed to move ancient landmarks (Pr. 22:8).  Newer “bible” translations teach an imperfect Jesus who cannot save.  Those who excuse mistakes in these versions blaspheme the Holy Spirit:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#imperfectJesus

Newer “bible” versions do not teach that God came to earth in the flesh.  They show the spirit of Antichrist:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#inFlesh

Preservation

Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein.  Jeremiah 6:16

Modernists say that the pure, inspired Words of God were lost in the 4th century until they were recovered by scholars in the 19th.  “Scholars” who promote this idea are pagan idolaters who reject the Divine nature of Scripture:

“In matters of textual criticism, the Bible is to be treated like any other ancient book.  No special considerations are to be made concerning its claims of inspiration or preservation.”  [emphasis added]
Westcott and Hort, The New Testament in the Original Greek, Introduction and Appendix, 1881

This is unbelief, pure and simple.  They mock God’s many promises to preserve His Word so that it would be continuously available from generation to generation forever.  This documents God’s promises to preserve His word.  Did God do that, or is He a liar?

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#preservation

And the burden of the LORD shall ye mention no more: for every man's word shall be his burden; for ye have perverted the words of the living God, of the LORD of hosts our God.  Jeremiah 23:36

It’s silly to say that manuscripts which omit more than 200 verses and major portions of other verses are as good as a manuscript which has them all.  If you agree with Jesus that “every word” is important enough to be preserved, these changes should bother you:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#erasing

Version Confusion

Satan isn’t able to destroy the Word of God, but he can bring about so many different versions that it’s hard for people to find the true word.

For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints.  I Corinthians 14:33

God is not the author of confusion, so we know that this confusion cannot be of God.  There are only two sides, so we know where the confusion originated.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#versionConfusion

The Oxford English Dictionary shows that the English word “baptize” was used to describe a religious sacrament as early as 1297, centuries before the KJB was translated.  It is unlike the non-religious Greek word which has secular meanings such as “immerse” or “wash.”  “Immerse” was translated to a well-established English word, not transliterated to a sound-alike.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#baptize

The Oxford English Dictionary shows that the English word “Easter” was established by 890.  It was used to refer to the Jewish Passover as well as to resurrection day.  “Easter” in Acts 12:4 was an appropriate use of the word:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#easter

The New Testament teaches that fasting is an important weapon in spiritual warfare.  Modern versions leave out nearly all references to the spiritual power of fasting:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#noFasting

Besides denying that Jesus is God and removing references to fasting, modern versions take out or weaken many other Spiritual principles:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/why-we-use-king-james-version-kjv.html#EandO

Outline for a Marriage Seminar

The Outline describes the talks and has links to each article.  Some have a sound file you can play to see how the message will work for you.  The goal is to get enough messages for a 2-week seminar and to offer support for English-teaching ministries.

The Apostle Paul had the gift of tongues.  He could speak in other languages, was given the gift of healing, and could adapt himself to other cultures.  I do not have those gifts.  I need help adapting what God gives me to your needs.  Please let me know what’s missing, what’s not clear, and what’s not needed.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/05/planning-for-2-week-marriage-seminar.html

When my wife and I were married in 1971, most of our friends were already divorced.  We saw that God had given us something precious in our marriage but we could not explain it.  We had nothing to say when her sister and my brother divorced and we wanted to help others avoid the pain.

We spent the next 46 years trying to explain what God had in mind when He made marriage so that others could enjoy the blessing God wants to give when a man and a woman enter into Holy Matrimony.  Everyone knows people whose marriages are in trouble or young people who are thinking of marrying.  This article summarizes the lessons:

Starting with eleven fired-up nobodies (Acts 4:13), Jesus’ gospel turned the world upside down (Acts 17:6).  Over the next 300 years, a quarter to a half the population of the Roman Empire either converted to Christianity or was sympathetic in spite of great persecution.  How did this come about?

… there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.  Galatians 3:28b

Christianity respects and values women far more than other faiths – they’re equal in value to men.

And the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom.  Mark 15:3

Having opened the temple veil so ordinary people can approach Him, God receives a woman whenever she wishes.  This was revolutionary, nobody imagined ordinary people approaching God without permission, especially not women.  Did Christianity succeed on its merits, or was there another driving force?

Some say that Jesus’ resurrection drove His followers to risk their lives to spread His message.  There would be no Christianity without His resurrection, but that wasn’t why they did it.  His resurrection showed His power over death, but that didn’t drive them to spread His gospel, they went fishing instead.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html

explains what drove Jesus’ 11 nobodies to turn the world upside-down.  His resurrection changed them, but didn't drive them.  What made them put their lives on the line to tell everyone about Jesus?  The mechanism that should drive marriages and churches and should drive you to spread His Gospel is explained in the second section.

If you meet someone whose life is lost in sin and despair, you know how to give God’s Simple Plan of Salvation.  Chapter 3 of this article explains that marriage is extremely simple.  The rest of the article builds on that.  The goal is to equip you to help others find the joy God offers through marriage.  It contains a total of 15 roughly one-hour sessions discussing various aspects of marriage.

WhatDroveJesus11NobodiesTurnWorldUpsideDown.doc is available for free from our shared folder:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1JQV9oEZwRL_H7Whck66UuRGruJQ2nfyk?usp=sharing

We set the price as low as Amazon would permit - 99 cents on Kindle:

https://www.amazon.com/Bill-and-Roberta-Taylor/e/B09DTMSHT8/

Seminar Opening Message - Married Couples Should Only Praise Each Other

The Bible explains marriage in one verse – this chapter explains it.  God’s rules are very simple.  Salvation is two words, “only believe.”  God’s rule for a man and woman coming together is three words, “only in marriage.”  Staying married is as simple as salvation, its two words, “only praise.”  We must praise our spouses as much and as often as God expects us to praise Him.  Moses warned that the Jews would be carried into captivity unless they loved God with grateful hearts and gave thanks for everything He gave:

Because thou servedst not the LORD thy God with joyfulness, and with gladness of heart, for the abundance of all things; 48Therefore shalt thou serve thine enemies which the LORD shall send against thee, in hunger, and in thirst, and in nakedness, and in want of all things: and he shall put a yoke of iron upon thy neck, until he have destroyed theeDeuteronomy 28:47-48

God’s people didn’t appreciate the blessings He gave them so He took everything away.  They were in want of “all things.”  We often take His gifts for granted.  “We never miss the water ‘til the well runs dry.”  Praising God for what He has given us takes our minds off worrying about what He hasn’t given.  Praising your spouse reminds you how blessed you are that God created marriage and that your spouse wants to share life with you.

Marriage is simpler than we think.  This paper explains marriage in only two words!

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#onlyPraise

Please improve the article by commenting on the web site.

Marriage Seminar for a Pastor’s Conference

This page describes a series of messages on teaching effective marriage and adds background notes.  It gives links to make the material easy to share:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/messages-to-help-teach-effective.html

It has the shared folder URL where you can download .doc files.  A message about developing God-honoring church leaders:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#developLeaders

A message showing similarities between salvation and marriage:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#marriageAndSalvation

The main secret to a long-lasting marriage is for both the husband and wife to make the other feel safe in being married.  This also makes the home a safe place for their children.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#feelSafe

This paper shows how you can explain both marriage and salvation in one minute

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#oneMinuteMarriage

Although the Bible commands older women to teach younger women about men, fathers can also teach their daughters important information to prepare them to be God’s good and perfect gifts to their husbands.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#fathersTeach

The message about marriage disappearing in the Western world is here:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#noMarriage  

The introduction:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#longerVersion

God expects all of His leaders to lead by serving their followers instead of commanding.  God holds leaders accountable for how they lead; He holds followers accountable for how they follow.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#servantLeaders

After Adam caused the fall, God explained what men and women must know about women to have happy marriages.  Most marriage issues are because men haven’t understood God’s lessons how to receive the joy women bring to men who love and appreciate them.  This talk takes about 20 minutes:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#decreed

Everyone knows about weeds so everyone sees how God punished Adam after the fall.  This explains how God’s punishments of Eve have affected everyone:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#inTheGarden

Our entire civilization is based on logic – it underlies mathematics, engineering, the Internet, electricity, and our high-tech civilization.  Complex technology cannot thrive without a reasonably competent government and a knowledge-driven educational system.  History shows, however, that too much logic destroys culture:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#destroyCulture

Drawing Closer To Each Other by Drawing Closer to God

God gave many Bible verses to explain what women desire from their husbands.  A husband should discuss them with his wife.  It’s amazing how God made men and women to think so differently.  God made women to help their husbands; her different way of thinking will help him understand the Mind of God.

Exploring God’s Word together will help him dwell according to knowledge of her as God commands (I Pe. 3:7).  In drawing closer to God by discussing His Word, they’ll draw closer to each other.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#discussionPoints

Causes of Marriage Problems

The root cause of marriage difficulties lies in the difference between head knowledge and heart knowledge.  Head knowledge is what we know (2 Tim. 3:7); heart knowledge is what we are (Pr. 27:3).  Most Christians have important head knowledge about marriage that hasn’t made its way into their hearts:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#headKnowledge

God expects a man to love his wife with everything he has without reservation.  A wife can’t comfort her husband and bless him as God planned unless she fees appreciated and loved as much as he loves God.  Your wife can’t bless you fully as you expect unless you love her with everything you have.  This article shows how God expects you to love Him, your wife, and, by extension, others:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#loveTheLordThyGod

It can be hard to keep our faith in God when things go badly wrong.  Scripture shows us what faith is and teaches that Ruth sowed in tears, but she reaped in joy after her husband died and God showed her proof of her faith:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2018/12/what-drove-jesus-11-nobodies-to-turn.html#sowInTears

Transcendental Questions:  Why are we here?  How did the universe and life come to be?

Humans have always looked up at the stars and wondered, “Where did stars come from?” and “Why are we here?”  Science didn’t have information detailed enough to address these questions until the 1970s or 80s.  Dr. Stephen C. Meyer wrote Signature in the Cell (https://a.co/d/h41pP21 2009) and Return of the God Hypothesis (https://a.co/d/e1qKuRQ 2021) to address the implications of three discoveries:

1)      Evidence from cosmology suggests that the material universe had a beginning (Big Bang).

2)      Evidence from physics showing that the universe has been “finely tuned” to support life.

3)      Evidence from biology establishes that large amounts of new functional genetic information have appeared in our biosphere to make new forms of life possible.

These books total 1179 pages.  This article summarizes Dr. Meyer’s demonstration that detailed knowledge of cosmology and biology show that intelligent design is the most logical explanation for the detailed order of the universe and for the vast amount of genetic information needed for cells to reproduce.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/transcendental-questions-why-are-we.html

The material universe that we see cannot have created itself.  Astronomers agree that the universe must have had a beginning.  That means that something must have caused it to begin.

This section discusses the origin of the material universe:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/transcendental-questions-why-are-we.html#cosmology

Physicists have measured many numbers such as the charge and mass of electrons and protons, the gravitational constant, the unexpected abundance of carbon on which life is based, and many other precise values that make life possible.  This section discusses the mystery of why these “finely tuned” parameters have their life-giving values:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/transcendental-questions-why-are-we.html#finelyTuned

Reproduction makes it possible for evolution to spread favorable mutations.  Evolution couldn’t start until life appeared.  Where did the first living cell come from?

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/transcendental-questions-why-are-we.html#microbiology

The Conflict Between Logic and Traditional Culture

Traditional culture runs on tradition – we’ve always done it this way, so people don’t think about it much.  Adopting western logical modes of thought leads people to question longstanding custom.  Logic is essential for operating our complex technical civilization – we need many logical workers climbing poles to fix wires to keep the lights on and the Internet working – but overdoing logic destroys a culture.

This paper explains how the wealth that logic brings destroys a culture:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2023/02/hear-voice-of-bridegroom-concerning.html#destroyCulture

Fatal Flaws in Fundamentalism

What’s wrong with fundamentalism?  Churches tried to agree on 10 or 12 “fundamentals” so they could work together.  That was anti-Biblical.  Some divide Moses’ law into ceremonial, moral, and judicial.  Paul wrote in Gal. 5:3 that Moses’ law is indivisible – anyone who follows it “is a debtor to do the whole law.”  He wrote “I have not shunned to declare unto you all the counsel of God (Acts 20:27).”  Moses’ law is indivisible; how can we declare “all the counsel of God” while focusing on a few fundamentals?

We’re to judge ideas by their fruits.  There are literally hundreds of Baptist groups focusing on different lists of “fundamentals.”  Regardless of the original idealistic goals, the idea was unfruitful from the beginning and has driven many away from the church.

This article goes into more detail about the foul fruits of the fundamental movement.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/fatal-flaws-in-fundamentalism.html

Making a Career in Computer Science

There are logic exercises from beginning readers up through 6th grade in this online folder which can be printed and shared:

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/10EfwNuJ5CQ1ostJk7TVqQoy1HIqZBb5Y?usp=sharing

Logic is so important to our society in general and to computer science in particular that there’s a free online course starting around 5th or 6t grade which explains how to use logic with facts to reach conclusions.

https://www.khanacademy.org/test-prep/lsat/lsat-lessons/logical-reasoning/a/logical-reasoning--article--getting-started

Someone who likes the lessons on logic might want to earn a living on computer security.  A really smart 5th or 6th grader could start to work with this.  There are two faces of computer security which is also called “cyber security:”

1)      Defending applications against cyber attack.  Application Security is abbreviated “AppSec.”

2)      Trying to break into applications to find vulnerabilities.  This is called “penetration testing,” “pen testing,” or “ethical hacking.”  People who do this are called “white hats” as opposed to the “back hats” who break in to steal money.

There is high demand for people who understand either face of cyber security.  I’ve collected a number of free documents about security, ChatGPT, and other topics in a shared folder:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1cXb_3RkE_jM2PPC0wnXaLgZtLlYjJIqr?usp=sharing

AdvancedPenetrationTesting, LearnPenetrationTesting, and BecomingAPenTestHacker go into detail.  Some businesses offer “bug bounty” if you find a new way to break into their application; people make a living doing this and there are online discussion groups.  Having a record of being able to break into web sites would be a good way to get hired.

KaiLinuxPenTestingBook describes a special edition of the Linux operating system with penetration tools built into it.  Being able to install Linux, configure it, and get the tools working would be a good line item for a resume for a job in system administration (sysadmin) as well as in pen testing.

AutomatedMachineLearning explains how to analyze vast quantities of data to reach computerized conclusions.

MachineLearningAndDataScience introduces machine learning from a different point of view.

Feedback welcome!

Is The Bible True?

Christians will fall away (Thes. 2:2-4[1]) and stop walking in God’s old paths (Jer. 6:16[2]) before the Antichrist is revealed.  We fell away from the doctrine of earth being the immovable center of the universe in the 1680s.  Galileo’s telescope showed him Jupiter’s moons orbiting Jupiter.  He declared that the earth orbits around the sun even though the Bible tells us that the earth cannot be moved (Ps. 93:1[3])!

The ancient Greeks proposed the theory of evolution.  That heresy couldn’t get far as long as God’s people understood that God has special love for the earth (Jn. 3:16) and that He put it immovably in the center of the universe.  Galileo began the process of seeing the earth as one minor dust mote among billions.  That made it easier for Christians to abandon the doctrine of 6-day creation in favor of the evolution heresy.

The Bible has more verses telling us that the earth doesn’t move than verses commanding us to love God!  Scripture teaches that everything goes around the earth.

“We know that the difference between a heliocentric (sun-centered) theory and a geocentric (earth-centered) theory is one of relative motion only, and that such a difference has no physical significance.”  Sir Fred Hoyle, Astronomy and Cosmology, A Modern Course, (San Francisco, W. H. Freeman & Co., 1975) p 416  [emphasis added]

Astronomers know that all their data can be interpreted to show the Earth at the center, but they prefer to argue that the Earth goes around the sun.  There is no conflict between science and Scripture saying that the sun goes around the Earth.  This is discussed here:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html

Scripture tells us that the entire universe revolves around the earth; science says that what goes around what doesn’t matter.  We may say that we believe and honor the Word of God with our lips (Mt. 15:8[4]), but do we have enough faith in God to believe His Word in our hearts?

Preferences

Scientists admit that they PREFER to say the earth goes around the sun – all of their data can be interpreted either way and some observations are VERY HARD to explain unless the earth is at the center:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#confess

Basing conclusions on preferences is NOT science.  That’s why Paul warned Timothy against the “oppositions of science falsely so called (1 Tim. 6:20)”

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2024/02/data-put-earth-at-center-of-universe.html

This section explains the Michelson-Morley Experiment (MME), the simplest of many experiments which show that the earth is the unmoving center.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#MME

Two experiments which confounded Einstein:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#Airy

Many Bible verses confirm that the earth does not move.  The earth is so special to God that He created it first and wrapped the universe around it a few days later as explained in Genesis 1.

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#verses

This paper goes into more detail about the Bible’s geocentric teaching:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#biblical

The Bible tells us where Hell is:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#bottomless

This paper shows how variations in the sun’s orbit controls earth’s climate:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#hungerStones

Deciding that the Bible had no authority when it said the earth did not move has led to Christians giving up other doctrines over time.  They’re listed here:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#abandonedDoctrines

The choice is simple: Do you trust “the oppositions of science falsely so called (1 Tim. 6:20)” or do you trust the Word of God?

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#follow

Progressive revelation applies to scientific discoveries as well as to Scripture.  The James Webb telescope has given yet more data which makes it even harder for scientists to avoid discussing the obvious solution of an unmoving earth:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#Webb

This is a short summary of the issue which quotes scientists who explain why they refuse to consider Biblical interpretations of their data:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2024/02/data-put-earth-at-center-of-universe.html

Creationism and ICR do a good job of supporting Genesis 1:20-27.  That leaves people doubting Genesis 1:1-19.  This 2-page paper quotes scientists who explain why they prefer not to consider geocentric interpretations of their data and spin counterintuitive “just-so stories” instead:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2024/02/data-put-earth-at-center-of-universe.html

Before he died, Galileo wrote a letter saying that he had repented of his heresy and that he agreed with Genesis 1:1-19:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-earth-does-not-move.html#recant

Could you please tell me if this short note makes sense?

Many modern Christians have chosen to stop believing 3 foundational Bible doctrines instead of supporting them by earnestly contending for the faith.  This weakens our message so we can’t influence society as God expects of us.  This is a 2-page explanation:

https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/2021/06/three-major-biblical-doctrines-modern.html

END



[1] That ye be not soon shaken in mind, or be troubled, neither by spirit, nor by word, nor by letter as from us, as that the day of Christ is at hand. 3Let no man deceive you by any means: for that day shall not come, except there come a falling away first, and that man of sin be revealed, the son of perdition; 4Who opposeth and exalteth himself above all that is called God, or that is worshipped; so that he as God sitteth in the temple of God, shewing himself that he is God.  II Thessalonians 2:2-4

[2] Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein.  Jeremiah 6:16

[3] The LORD reigneth, he is clothed with majesty; the LORD is clothed with strength, wherewith he hath girded himself: the world also is stablished, that it cannot be movedPsalm 93:1

[4] This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart is far from me.  Matthew 15:8

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